Marsha GillBreakups are always a challenging thing to do. Even when you know it’s the right thing to do because it’s causing more harm than good. Letting go in any relationship can be challenging, and franking is one of the hardest things to do. So it is with breaking up with negative thought patterns. Your personal beliefs about yourself and your life matter more than you realize. Those beliefs become the very foundation from which you build your life. Here are some common self-limiting thoughts:
-I’ll never be able to save any money
-I guess I won’t ever fall in love again
-Why can’t I find any trustworthy friends
-I’m sure Tiffany will get that promotion over me
-I’m not good enough
-You’re not doing enough
-How will I ever live the life I want, earning what I earn now
-I don’t deserve to be a happy
Could you connect with any of the limiting thoughts from the list above? Maybe you have your list that sounds different; that’s okay. That’s awareness, and I’m here for it!! Cause self-limiting thoughts hinder you from living, learning, and growing. Here are a few ways to break your cognitive ties to those thinking patterns and start thinking in a new direction and experience freedom:
- Refrain from negatively labeling yourself. You might unconsciously strive to match that label if you see yourself as “poor” financially. Or if you think of yourself as “undeserving,” you may be unable to imagine yourself as worthy.
- Take baby steps. You’ve got to start somewhere. You’ll gain the momentum to keep going when you continually move towards your goals. Rather than think you’re unable to achieve success, make a plan of achievable steps to ensure you do. Looking to save. Instead of believing you’ll never get there, establish a small weekly savings goal of $20, and grow from there. This will help build confidence and break the cycle of self-doubt.
- Learn to be your own best friend. Love yourself enough to be your own best friend. You would never talk to others the way you talk to yourself. Practice giving yourself the benefit of the doubt. Instead of what you can’t do, focus on what you can do. Reframe your thoughts to be more positive and empowering. For example, instead of saying, “I’m not good enough,” say, “I’m working on improving myself.”
- Believe in yourself. Instead of insisting you’ll “never” do something, say that you can, and then do it. If you turn those negatives into positives, it boosts your self-esteem. Trust that you can accomplish, succeed, and prevail.Recognize how powerful your negative thoughts are. You create who you are by what you think about yourself. Why not turn that power and effort in a way that drives you towards your goals in life? Determine the truth. Learn to put your thoughts on trial. Ask yourself, “Is what I’m thinking true?” For example, is it an absolute reality that you’ll never be able to save any money at all? It doesn’t have to be true unless you strive for that. Change your mindset by beginning your savings today. Put all your change into a jar at the end of the day. See how simple it is to start saving! You can break up with self-limiting thoughts and think in a new direction when you realize they’re unrealistic, untrue, and within your power to change.
- Learn from prior errors. Instead of allowing your past to hold you, hostage, consider the knowledge you’ve gained from each experience. Maybe that meaningful relationship ran its course. Losing that relationship doesn’t mean you’ll never find another partner again. Rather than getting bogged down with self-limiting thoughts, reflect on the shortcomings of your previous relationship. What role did you play? If you proactively learn from your past mistakes, you’ll make healthier choices in the future.
By applying these strategies, you’ll discover endless possibilities in your life. Believe in yourself, break up with self-limiting beliefs, and start living your best life. Don’t let your doubts and fears hold you back any longer. Take control of your life and reach for the skies. The opportunities are waiting for you, so make the most of them. You have the power to achieve anything you set your mind to. Keep going; you’ve got this!
